{"id":16529,"date":"2014-08-27T12:56:03","date_gmt":"2014-08-27T17:56:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/?p=16529"},"modified":"2014-08-30T13:38:54","modified_gmt":"2014-08-30T18:38:54","slug":"dear-someone-for-the-sake-of-the-song","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/2014\/08\/27\/dear-someone-for-the-sake-of-the-song\/","title":{"rendered":"Dear Someone: For the Sake of the Song"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"attachment_16531\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\" style=\"width: 150px\"><a href=\"http:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/08\/Walker_Lukens_082814.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-16531 size-thumbnail\" src=\"http:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/08\/Walker_Lukens_082814-150x150.jpg\" alt=\"Walker_Lukens_082814\" width=\"150\" height=\"150\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/08\/Walker_Lukens_082814-150x150.jpg 150w, https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/08\/Walker_Lukens_082814-120x120.jpg 120w, https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/08\/Walker_Lukens_082814-50x50.jpg 50w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 150px) 100vw, 150px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p class=\"wp-caption-text\">Photo by Lobo Sucio Creative.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<p><em style=\"color: #282828;\"><span style=\"color: #222222;\">Walker Lukens is a musician living and working in Austin, Texas. His latest album is called\u00a0<\/span><strong>Devoted<\/strong><span style=\"color: #222222;\">. His advice column\u00a0<\/span><strong style=\"color: #222222;\">Dear Someone\u00a0<\/strong><span style=\"color: #222222;\">runs semimonthly on Pop Press\u00a0International. You can send in your own inquiries by emailing Walker\u00a0<span style=\"text-decoration: underline; color: #0000ff;\"><span style=\"color: #0000ff; text-decoration: underline;\"><a style=\"color: #282828; text-decoration: underline;\" href=\"mailto:walker@poppressinternational.com\">here<\/a><\/span><\/span><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\"><span style=\"color: #0000ff;\">\u00a0<em style=\"color: #282828;\"><span style=\"color: #222222;\">or by using the submission form at the bottom of this post<\/span><\/em><\/span><\/span>. He\u2019ll give you advice if you ask.\u00a0<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n<p>Dear Walker,<\/p>\n<p>I am a new fan of your music after seeing you at Barons last night. I\u2019m a musician also and the singer in a band\u2014really curious to get your opinion about something as a fellow lyricist. My lyrics are very autobiographical and usually stem directly from my life. So since my ex-girlfriend left me to be with someone else, it\u2019s all I\u2019ve been able to write about. My band thinks these are the best songs that we\u2019ve ever made and I agree. Not surprisingly, these songs are mean. I\u2019m angry at her. The songs are angry. The catchiest song uses her name in the chorus and not in a nice way.<\/p>\n<p>What\u2019s your feeling about this? You think it\u2019s okay to write really angry and mean songs about someone? She <em>cheated <\/em>on me. I have a right to be angry, but can I say awful things about her in a song? Do songwriters get a pass?<\/p>\n<p>Sincerely,<\/p>\n<p>Jilted<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/08\/sad_pup.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-16530\" src=\"http:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/08\/sad_pup.jpg\" alt=\"sad_pup\" width=\"640\" height=\"640\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/08\/sad_pup.jpg 640w, https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/08\/sad_pup-150x150.jpg 150w, https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/08\/sad_pup-300x300.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/08\/sad_pup-120x120.jpg 120w, https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/08\/sad_pup-50x50.jpg 50w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>——<\/p>\n<p>Dear Jilted,<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m glad you enjoyed the show. Mad thanks to The Blind Pets for letting us hop on their bill TWO HOURS BEFORE THE SHOW.<\/p>\n<p>It is important to express your anger, which I know from years of not doing it so well. I\u2019m talking about raw, unmediated rage. This is not to say you should ever direct it at someone in the moment. (Probably always a bad move to yell at someone.) Go up into the mountains around your beautiful town and yell all the impolite things that you need to yell. Feel all your feelings, or they\u2019ll come back and bite you one day!<\/p>\n<p>I wrote a lot of mean songs when I was a teenager, and I definitely got off on the fact that I had a soapbox from which to share them. My main regret was revealing who inspired the songs\u2014passive aggressive behavior, emo-style, at it\u2019s finest. While singing angry songs added to my generally ornery air, it did not make me less angry. \u00a0It gave a false sense of meaning to the negative experiences I had. I thought there was some sort of heroism to sharing my experiences with the world. There wasn\u2019t and still isn\u2019t. It did take some guts, however. It\u2019s courageous to get in front of people and sing about your life, but it\u2019s not an altruistic service. This overly sentimental point of view has caused me to bite my lip and put sunglasses on among musicians on more than one occasion. You entertain people at bars. Come on now.<\/p>\n<p>I have no doubt that writing about your life helps you process your feelings. The content however is not making the songs better\u2014it\u2019s the passion and the authenticity of the narrative. If people need to know the backstory to like the songs, they probably aren\u2019t that good.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cFuck you, (insert ex-girlfriend\u2019s name)\u2019 is a hurtful thing to say or sing. From a stage, it\u2019s only a one-way conversation and, in that way, also cowardly. I don\u2019t recommend it. If it won\u2019t ruin the song, you should drop your ex\u2019s name altogether or at least consider changing it. In so much as you are trying to communicate with your girlfriend, let this koan sink in: Success is the best revenge. Acting aloof will sting more down the line than lashing out will in the moment.<\/p>\n<p>Sincerely,<\/p>\n<p>Walker<\/p>\n<p>To submit your inquiries for Walker’s next column, email him\u00a0<span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><a href=\"mailto:walker@poppressinternational.com\">here<\/a><\/span>, or use the submission form below.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #555555;\">[bestwebsoft_contact_form]<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Walker Lukens is a musician living and working in Austin, Texas. His latest album is called\u00a0Devoted. His advice column\u00a0Dear Someone\u00a0runs semimonthly on Pop Press\u00a0International. You can send in your own inquiries by emailing…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":20,"featured_media":16531,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[81,2766,17],"tags":[2728,2727,2729,1504],"class_list":["post-16529","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog","category-columns","category-features","tag-advice","tag-column","tag-dear-someone","tag-walker-lukens"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16529","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/20"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=16529"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16529\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":16544,"href":"https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16529\/revisions\/16544"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/16531"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=16529"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=16529"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.poppressinternational.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=16529"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}